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Thursday, October 13, 2005

How to make a lazy $2 Million (less some expenses)

TWO million dollars will be offered today as reward for solving the murders of Jennifer Tanner and Adele Bailey.


Indemnities from prosecution will also be announced to help flush out the killer or killers.

Former Victoria Police officer Denis Tanner has been accused of murdering his sister-in-law Jennifer and transsexual prostitute Adele Bailey.

He has not been charged over either death and strongly maintains his innocence.


Ok, listen up, you won't get an easier way to make a lazy 2 Million:
1/ Buy video Camera ($1500) and a tape ($5).
2/ "Acquire" sawn off shotgun/hand gun/steel capped boots. ($1000)
3/ Find Denis Tanner.
4/ Threaten him with guns while placing steel capped boot on his throat.
5/ Film him confessing to both murders. (After you take foot off throat- make it look like a covert filming NOT a forced confession)
6/ Send to TV, Newspapers, police and your nan (safekeeping)
7/ Sit back and wait for the cash.

Seriously he's the single guiltiest, craziest mother fuckers on planet earth. I suspect if we put him in Mr Psycho Universe he'd give any Kligon, Wookie or Martian a serious fucking run. MUI have met Denis in passing once (at Adele Bailey's inquest) and the lights are on and they are FUCKING MAD-RED. Mad. Nutty. BOING! Zing Blinky blink! He would pass a lie detector test because he has twisted his life that way. He's so nutty that when Jon Faine on the ABC asked him about who killed his "ex wife" Denis FORGOT to mention she was his BROTHER'S EX WIFE. That is some nutty shit right there.

The Age take on this
Hear Denis on the ABC forgetting that he killed the brother's wife This will only last a week- listen up while you can!
Herald Sun: $2m bid to solve murder riddle [13oct05]

4 comments:

  1. Anonymous11:08 pm

    'either of the two shots fired into Mrs Tanner's skull would have killed her instantly or almost instantly.'

    the forensic pathologist used by Richter (as mentioned in your 17 May post) could possibly successfully refute that one (again, for a new court).

    nobody ever mentions that there has been a 3rd death connected to this case, which was disguised as a car crash, in Tasmania, where the deceased moved thinking they would be safe.

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  2. $2m is such a nice round figure. Today The HerSun tells us:
    'The price tag was just over $2 million and the sale was finalised without the property being subject to finance'.
    Happy little homemakers. I do hope their windows are tougher than golfballs from that tee they overlook at the Heidelberg Golf Course. A lotta cops will be playing through regularly I guess

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  3. Anonymous4:08 am

    Is Denis Australia's answer to OJ Simpson? Nah, white men can't jump

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous5:53 pm

    meh

    ReplyDelete

Don't screw this up.